I hate when I get mad

I hate when I get mad.

Managing an 8th grade classroom can be so hard. 

I hate when I get mad because I know what they need is love and positive encouragement. 

Sometimes, the negative vibe of anger just makes things worse in the classroom.

I hate when I get mad because it’s not who I am. I’m most comfortable when I’m optimistic and having fun. That’s who I want to be for my students.

At the end of the day, the moments when I lost my cool or said something sarcastic play back over and over again in my mind and I wish I would’ve handled it differently.

I hate when I get mad because it doesn’t feel good for any of us. I know, whether they act apathetic or not, the students are happier when they’re doing their best and not upsetting me. Everyone wants to do well.

The anger comes from fear that I’ve lost control. What do any of us really control anyway? I know I need to teach by being a good example. Then, it’s their choice.  “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”

I love my students. As much as I want them to succeed and I care about them, I also must take care of myself. If teacher’s not happy, nobody’s happy. Remaining calm, modeling love and positivity, even in the most challenging moments (disrespect, disruptions, unkindness towards eachother) is my work. My wish for all of us is peace.

So, I hate when I get mad. It feels like I’ve failed at what I believe in.

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9 thoughts on “I hate when I get mad

  1. Please don’t beat yourself up. You are working with such a hormonal age…you are bound to feel and take on many different emotions, too. I bet if you shared what you are/were feeling with them, it would be awesome modeling for those firecracker teenagers-in-the-making. Tomorrow is a new day! Those kids are so lucky to have you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Wow! Your love and genuine care for the students really shines through in this piece. You know what they need and you are so right! “The anger comes from dear that I’ve lost control” what a reflection! I admire you for always trying to be the best role model possible for your students! But…you are human too so cut yourself a little break! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Sara, I just can’t imagine you mad – it really doesn’t seem like you at all. But I’ll take your word for it that you were. I love everything you wrote here. I wish all teachers felt like this. I wish I could bottle it and sell it.

    I relate to this most as a mom. I hate when I lose my patience with my kids. When I do, I always admit I was wrong, apologize, and hug it out. I think the kids would respect you even more than they already do if you just said “sorry, that’s not the type of teacher I want to be.”

    This was a great read. Tons of respect for you over here.

    Like

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